BANANA BABIES
There were never any pictures of my mom pregnant. So I asked her about it. She just stuttered something about how she didn’t want any pictures of her looking like a bloated walrus for all the world to see but I knew that wasn’t true.
So I asked the little man that lives inside my dreams and he gave me a clue:
Most people aren’t born in bananas
They come from hospitals, homes and cabanas
WHoah. Is it possible to be born inside of a banana? So I went on the Webbernet and looked up any cases I could find and I found some unusual laws that were passed around the same time as my birth having to do with fruit pickery and handling. I think the law went something like this:
Orchards must check for the signs
Of babies that grow on green vines
I could not believe this for the longest time but then I asked Uncle Steve, who is a banana farmer. Actually he’s pretty much the king of banana farming and he told me a secret. He told me: “I WAS THE ONE WHO PICKED YOU. And I knew your parents were the right people for such ha special job.” So it might seem unlikely at first,
But out of an unripe banana I came
And now never will Dole be the same
